Cultivating Emotional Sobriety for the Preservation of Human Bond

Much of contemporary human experience appears marked by a persistent existential irritation. The modern individual, rather than turning inward, projects their attention outward, often forgetting that the external world is ultimately a reflection—or, to borrow a computing metaphor, a program—of the internal self. This inversion of perspective produces a disjunction: humans respond to the world without fully understanding the underlying causes within themselves.

From this standpoint, the reductionist position advanced by certain branches of neuroscience is not without merit, as it interprets emotions as the outcomes of neural and biochemical processes. Feelings, affections, and impulses are framed as adaptive mechanisms for survival. While this view may seem stark or even cynical, it possesses a form of intellectual honesty reminiscent of Oscar Wilde’s disenchanted lucidity, whose thought, precise and sometimes unflinching, rejects comforting illusions.

Similarly, the Qur’an addresses the nature of emotions in a notably realistic manner. Rather than presenting them as moral guides, the Islamic sacred text highlights their instability and potential for deception. “Indeed, the soul incites [to evil] persistently” (Sūrah Yūsuf, 12:53), it declares, indicating that the emotional dimension, if left undisciplined, can lead humans away from balance and justice.

Living with Emotional Sobriety

The question then arises: how can one cultivate emotional sobriety—acknowledging emotions without being dominated by them? The Qur’an does not advocate repression but emphasizes inner vigilance (taqwā). “Allah does not change the condition of a people until they change what is within themselves” (Sūrah al-Ra‘d, 13:11). Coranic ethics stresses personal responsibility as a prerequisite for any judgment of others.

In contemporary society, psychological and moral labels—such as narcissist, psychopath, or toxic—proliferate. Traits once addressed through forgiveness—toward oneself, toward others, and toward God—are now frequently treated as signs of irrevocable incompatibility. Yet the Qur’an maintains: “Good and evil are not equal. Repel evil with that which is better” (Sūrah Fuṣṣilat, 41:34). Forgiveness, in this framework, is not naïveté but a vital anthropological mechanism for sustaining social cohesion.

Compatibility, Procreation, and the Continuity of the Human Species

The contemporary preoccupation with absolute compatibility—emotional, psychological, and ethical—risks fragmenting the social fabric. Taken to its extreme, this logic produces a society of mutually incompatible individuals, where relational selection replaces dialogue, patience, and mutual growth. Paradoxically, the pursuit of emotional authenticity can undermine the continuity of human life and society itself.

The Qur’an addresses marriage and procreation pragmatically rather than romantically: “Among His signs is that He created for you spouses from among yourselves so that you may find tranquility in them, and He placed between you affection (mawadda) and mercy (raḥma)” (Sūrah al-Rūm, 30:21). Affection and mercy are not idealized prerequisites but outcomes of a shared journey—processes that mature over time rather than instantaneous feelings or “Walt Disney” illusions.

The metaphor of the “veil” is central: before obsessively questioning emotional compatibility, the individual is called to move beyond the illusions of the ego and focus on a larger objective—the continuity of life and society. “And Allah has made you successors on the earth” (Sūrah al-An‘ām, 6:165). From this perspective, procreation is not merely a biological act but an exercise in historical responsibility.

Gratitude as a Foundational Value

In a world dominated by dissatisfaction and demands, gratitude emerges as a fundamental ethical value. The Qur’an states unequivocally: “If you are grateful, I will surely increase you [in favor]” (Sūrah Ibrāhīm, 14:7). Gratitude does not negate the hardships of life; rather, it contextualizes them, liberating the individual from the tyranny of transient emotions.

In conclusion, the emotional sobriety advocated by both neuroscience and the Qur’an is not a form of dehumanization. Rather, it represents a return to a more comprehensive understanding of humanity: fallible, changeable, yet capable of forgiveness, continuity, and gratitude. All other experiences—unattainable dreams, romantic idealizations, and promises of absolute happiness—remain what they have always been: fleeting shades of the human condition.